Slowly but surely I’m getting kinda used to unattended bikes flooding the city. People just don’t seem to give a fuck about the state their ride is in and the reasons for that are as incomprehensible as they are varied: “I don’t have the time for maintenance”, “I’m broke”, “my bike is less likely to get stolen if I leave it in a crappy state”, “I’m, like, totally into the rusty, shabby look” and so on and so forth. Ok, to each his own, but what if someone with that attitude actually took the time to fix something as useful as lighting, went out of his way to buy some cables and a new lamp and sat down to get the job done?
Don’t let yourself get distracted by the cockpit, I’ll get to that. And don’t even start to think about the front fender, the shiny front rim in contrast to the rusted rear rim or the superbe ‘heavy u-lock covers four spokes’ anti theft mechanism. Check out dis ride here’s fantastic cable routing. Made in Germany of course:
Although I’ve seen about a million bikes mistreated by ‘qualified service personnel’, I just can’t imagine someone would pay money for this:
‘Hmm, maybe if I wrap it around a couple more times it won’t matter that the rest of the cable is all over the place’. That sounds reasonable. Just make sure to follow that scheme all the way through:
There, that’ll do it. Practical and sturdy. Of course the rear rack’s rusty springs are the best place to mount the rear light, everyone knows that. And another universal engineering rule of thumb: Use isolation tape wherever and whenever possible. But don’t tighten it up, it might squeeze your cables to death. Instead, just finish the job quickly so you’ll have more time to adjust the perfect handlebar angle:
Way to go, now noone instead of yourself will understand how to ride this bike. Or to make it stop.
And you thought riding a fixed gear was badass…