Every year round springtime you get a front row seat at the great show of cycling styles even if you choose to not take part. You simply set a foot outside and are almost run over by a fixed gear cause the rider was too busy looking at his new cycling shoes or admiring the top tube of his new frame or whatever. Everyone is flashing the hot new shit and they’ve been waiting for that time of the year for about half a year so everybody goes completely nuts. I’m telling you, Fashion Week is a joke in comparison. Finally you can show your new acquisition to the world and take some epic sunset bike porn instagram shots and attend alleycats and all that stuff. But remember, it’s not enough to simply buy a new frame and post your gear ratio on facebook, you gotta step it up a notch if you wanna get some real credit. Fixed gear just ain’t shocking anymore so you gotta get creative. Form a fixed gear posse, go out for an epic tour, organize local alleycats and invite other crews and most importantly, choose your add on attitude wisely and follow through. It has to be some combination of fixed gear and something else that has absolutely nothing to do with cycling whatsoever but still you gotta act as if those things were universally connected. Like bikes and music. Or bikes and eating habits. Need a hint? Here you go:
First of all, ladies frame fixed conversion. What can I say, it’s so senseless and thus rare to find that you could almost spare the extra attitude. But dis ride here’s serious business. Notice the music scene connection made ever so clear by simply using the same sticker over and over again:
The expression Punk has undergone so many changes throughout the last 40 years I’m not even sure what it means nowadays. But I guess bike punks must be down with a certain shabby street look, even if it means that you have to artificially downgrade your social status so you’ll fit the scene. Back in the late 80s, early 90s there was a huge trend within the fading punk and rising hardcore scene where everyone was so concerned with being anti establishment, anti consumerism and all that stuff but actually had to consume certain things to follow the scene’s demands. Like vinyl or certain clothes that would form his or here scene uniform. I imagine a bike punk would have the same enemies as scenesters back then but actully has to consume some ecologically very unfriendly products like steel and aluminum frames, some fresh rubber tires about every two weeks cause skidding takes its toll or lycra jerseys and bibs. And to top it off, like back in the good old days of 90s hardcore, listening to the music and dressing like everyone else in the scene was not enough, you had to be somehow involved in the animal rights thing. And the best way to do that was by telling people what they should or shouldn’t eat:
If the exclamation mark wasn’t there I wouldn’t have noticed probably but now I’m seriously contemplating my eating habits. Can I still kepp my Sidis though? Cause they still might be good for another 5 or 6 years but if I absolutely have to I’ll get some vegan cycling shoes.
That might finally give me some credit..